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Recognizing danger in a domestic violence case
Plain-language pages built from the risk and lethality material taught to Erie County family law attorneys. Nothing here asks for your name, and nothing you touch is saved or sent anywhere.
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Most of what decides a domestic violence case is not the worst incident
It is the pattern around it. New York judges and the attorneys who appear in front of them are trained to look for a specific set of factors, because research on domestic homicide shows those factors keep turning up before someone is killed.
These pages put that same material in plain language, for the person living it and for the family member watching it happen. They are educational. They are not legal advice, and they are not an assessment of your situation.
Three things the training says, that almost nobody outside a courtroom hears
Leaving is the most dangerous part.
The highest risk window is the days to months after the other person works out that you might separate, or that you have told someone what is happening. That is not a reason to stay. It is a reason to plan the exit with an advocate rather than improvise it.
Victims underestimate the danger. They rarely overestimate it.
Jacquelyn Campbell's study of women who were killed or nearly killed by a partner found they were unlikely to over-estimate their risk, and that many under-estimated how severe the situation had become. Only about half accurately perceived that they could be killed. So if your own instinct is telling you this is getting worse, that instinct is data. It is a recognized risk factor, and it belongs in a petition rather than left unsaid.
Fabricated allegations are rare, and are not the same thing as an imperfect story.
The December 2025 Erie Institute of Law program puts the national collective experience at 15 to 20 percent or fewer. What matters at least as much is that a fabricated allegation is a different thing from a story told out of order, a recollection that shifts, or an account with no photographs behind it. Trauma scrambles chronology. That is a known feature of how memory works under stress, not a sign of lying.
Six pages, six different questions
The 13 red flags
The factors most commonly present when the risk of serious harm or death exists, each with what a New York court can order in response. No score, ever.
DefinitionIs this abuse?
Six behaviors that get argued over in courtrooms every week, and the Intent, Meaning, Effect test that resolves them. Plus the eight tactics of coercive control.
FilingWhich court, which order
Family Court, Criminal Court and Supreme Court are different tools, not alternatives. Five questions, then what an order can actually be written to include.
ProcessWhat happens after you file
Filing, the same-day hearing, service, the return date, how long an order lasts, the Hope Card, and what to do if the order is broken.
HelpErie County help
Fourteen real local organizations with real numbers. A 24 hour hotline, a 36 bed shelter, and a forensic unit that documents strangulation.
StandingMelanie's Law
Since November 2024 you can file against a relative of someone you were in a relationship with. Most people, and some clerks, do not know this yet.
What these pages are
General legal information about New York law, published by Weinrieb Law, a family law firm in Williamsville, New York. This is attorney advertising. It is not legal advice, it does not create an attorney client relationship, and it is not a risk assessment of any individual situation. Prior results do not guarantee a similar outcome.
These pages set no advertising or analytics cookies and keep nothing you click, mark or type. Like the rest of this site, they note how you arrived (from a search, for example) for this browser tab only, and that note is erased when the tab closes. They cannot erase the visit from your browsing history.
Statutory references are to the New York Family Court Act, Domestic Relations Law, Penal Law and Real Property Law. Statutes change. Confirm current law before relying on any of it.
Sources
- Identifying Risk and Lethality Factors in Domestic Violence Cases, Erie Institute of Law and Bar Association of Erie County, presented by Hon. Sheila Schwanekamp (Ret.), December 10, 2025.
- Domestic Violence Risk Factor Guide for Civil Legal Attorneys, January 20, 2024, adapted from the New York State guide for Family Court judges. Center for Court Innovation.
- Lawyer's Manual on Domestic Violence: Representing the Victim, 6th Edition, New York State Unified Court System.
- Domestic Violence, Developing Brains, and the Lifespan, Lynn Hecht Schafran, The Judges' Journal 53(3), Summer 2014.
Sources, continued
- Working with Survivors of Abuse: A Trauma Informed Approach, Public Interest Pro Bono Association.
- Laws of New York 1996, Chapter 85, and Laws of 2009, Chapter 476.
- Campbell et al., Risk Factors for Femicide in Abusive Relationships, American Journal of Public Health 93(7):1089 (2003).
- Campbell, Helping Women Understand Their Risk in Situations of Intimate Partner Violence, Journal of Interpersonal Violence 19(12):1464 (2004).
- 2025 Domestic Violence Court Advocate List for Erie County, last updated January 31, 2024.